It is the first week back to school for a new term. People are either excited to be there or dreading the outcome of yet another unsuccessful term. I, for one, was ecstatic to return to school to see my friends, be in my own room, and have a whole new set of classes with interesting professors/students. I did what everyone does in a room full of new people, I observed those around me. You might call it judging. But I can only focus in on the strange people for so long before I begin to get curious about how they manage to live the lives they lead. Then I find myself day dreaming about myself acting with such peculiar characteristics, and before I knew it the kid next to me had to nudge me, and tell me to stop spasuming and drooling.
I noticed the "pretty girls" (a nice way of categorizing the materialistic bitches who don't know how to think for themselves) prep their faces, which were already caked with layers of foundation for their ONE class that day. Life must be swell as Barbie... I wouldn't know, I'm too busy pretending to be G.I. Jane! But there's got to be some truth in these types of girls. I must give them credit, they have to be smart enough to have made it this far in school... unless they're majoring in Business... In that case, no wonder they have all the free time in the world to spend creating the perfect look which masks their true identities and lures in the most shallow men. I'm not saying you have to be ugly to tempt a worthy man, I'm saying, there's more to a true special woman than what she looks like.
As I get older, I worry about health issues. How young I am, yet I'm worried about some long word, german spelling, impossible to pronounce disease that only occurs in 1 out of every 300,000 people. I promise you, I think I'm showing symptoms. But seriously, I do wish I could be more of a healthy person. Not just what I eat (or don't eat) but in my daily life habitat. Such as abiding by the FIVE second rule, not the 15... meh, make it 20 second rule. Or "the expiration date says it's a week old". Perfect, it's still good!
I've recently started carrying around a purse. This is something new in my life because my mother and sister think it is time I grow up. Somewhere, in the handbook for life, I missed the section where it talks about a woman embarrassing herself by carrying around a bag which contains useless pieces of shit that could otherwise be thrown away, burned, eaten, or not even exist at all. So, because I've never carried around a purse before (I usually used my pockets of my jeans or jacket as useful compartment when traveling) I wasn't sure what all goes into a purse. Here I am, walking around with a purse which contains solely my wallet. An empty bag with my wallet... yeah, REAL glad I made this social transformation! I now have to take my phone from the convenience of my pocket and put it in my purse where I cannot feel/hear it vibrate or ring.
With all of these new changes and the beginning of a new term, I feel metamorphosed (yes, this is the correct translation of the word 'metamorphosis') into a different, yet the same person. Not better, not worse but changed in how I look at things. For example, I am now confident when someone asks me how I am doing, I can reply honestly by saying, "I have to pee but there's a line, I have over 100 pages to read before tomorrow but I'd rather play on facebook, I'm generally happy even when I don't look it and overall I'm copesthetic, but in the moment extremely focused from the work you're distracting me from. Oh yeah, how are you?"
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Irish Boxing
Friends of mine and I went to this Irish Boxing Fundraiser this past Friday. The four of us girls showed up two hours ahead of time to get good seats. Sitting in one spot for that long is difficult for me. I don't like sitting and doing nothing. However, I found a way to entertain myself by watching the characters come through the entrances. There was all shapes of people and clothed in "fashionable" ways. One common trait between the people arriving were the tattoos people displayed. On the younger people the tattoos were purely for show and looked as though they had no thought put into them whatsoever. The older people's tattoos were much the same just in a stretched out, wrinkly version. Old people's tattoos are like bar codes. The long lines and the only way to read them is if you tilt them up and read them from the long end.
Next I couldn't help but eavesdrop on other people's conversations. Yes, I know it's rude but I was not interested in the conversations the other girls were having (actually I wasn't even paying attention to what they were talking about), so I tuned into random phrases I could pick up from the surrounding people. I heard some odd, redneck, left-field phrases, such as: "'Heard your old lady broke your tractor" or "I hope uncle John can find it and hold onto it" and "But you haven't happened to notice what she's done with the back of it" I did not see where or from whom these phrases came from and quite frankly, I am glad I didn't.
During the boxing, there were your regular gut punches, right hooks, bloody noses (almost every match a guy got a bloody nose) and old men bending over gasping for air, taking their personal time out even though the bell had not yet rang. In between matches, the ring announcer would "entertain"/annoy the audience with jokes to keep from having the awkward silence. I think everyone would have preferred the awkward silence than another one of his jokes.
Then there was an auction for t-shirts. The auctioneer could ramble off the words like they were gibberish or some foreign language that has either been forgotten or has yet to be decoded. During auctions I always become extra aware of my upper limbs. It's like I become half paralyzed or paranoid with my arms. This is NOT the time to scratch your head or pick your nose. You don't know what you'll end up paying for it.
Next I couldn't help but eavesdrop on other people's conversations. Yes, I know it's rude but I was not interested in the conversations the other girls were having (actually I wasn't even paying attention to what they were talking about), so I tuned into random phrases I could pick up from the surrounding people. I heard some odd, redneck, left-field phrases, such as: "'Heard your old lady broke your tractor" or "I hope uncle John can find it and hold onto it" and "But you haven't happened to notice what she's done with the back of it" I did not see where or from whom these phrases came from and quite frankly, I am glad I didn't.
During the boxing, there were your regular gut punches, right hooks, bloody noses (almost every match a guy got a bloody nose) and old men bending over gasping for air, taking their personal time out even though the bell had not yet rang. In between matches, the ring announcer would "entertain"/annoy the audience with jokes to keep from having the awkward silence. I think everyone would have preferred the awkward silence than another one of his jokes.
Then there was an auction for t-shirts. The auctioneer could ramble off the words like they were gibberish or some foreign language that has either been forgotten or has yet to be decoded. During auctions I always become extra aware of my upper limbs. It's like I become half paralyzed or paranoid with my arms. This is NOT the time to scratch your head or pick your nose. You don't know what you'll end up paying for it.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Once upon dream
I took a nap this weekend after having slept in until 12:30 or so. Oh it was nice, thanks for asking! As i slipped away into my slumber my dream turned into a hair-raising nightmare. You know dreams are bad when they are circus or carnival themed! Lucky me it was all of the above. (Please wait to use your Freudian Powers to analyze this when you're finished reading.)
I wish there was some variety as to what kind of people were in my dream but sorry to say, there were the typical clowns, lost crying child holding an ice cream and a balloon, fortune teller lady with a fake towel on her head and a ring leader.
The characters themselves may have varied.
I began walking over a grassy hill, thinking the grass would be greener on the other side. No, not really; it wasn't. I bought my "tickets" which was two strips of bacon stamped with pig faces. I first walked to a dart board. The fat man with a mustache handed me six darts. I took my aim at the typical water balloons. With each throw the fat man got skinnier and younger. (Not better looking) The water balloons were filled with fetuses. Scary right? Tell me about.
Moving on! I went to the fortune teller. This was not the typical bony, skin heavy, raspy speaking creepy lady. No this was a homosexual body builder stature guy. He was wearing a backward baseball cap with a tiny tank top. He told me that by time i wanted to or was able to get married there weren't going to be any diamonds left for my ring.
Then I went on a ride. Usually I am all game for carni rides! The scarier the better. Except for one ride. The ride where you're spinning in a circle and the bucket you're sitting in is also spinning in a separate circle. After I got off this ride people were walking normal but their heads were spinning in circles. Round and round their body.
I finally woke up from this scary, weird, random, illogical dream. I'm watching what i eat from now on and contemplating about testing the water of La Grande.
I wish there was some variety as to what kind of people were in my dream but sorry to say, there were the typical clowns, lost crying child holding an ice cream and a balloon, fortune teller lady with a fake towel on her head and a ring leader.
The characters themselves may have varied.
I began walking over a grassy hill, thinking the grass would be greener on the other side. No, not really; it wasn't. I bought my "tickets" which was two strips of bacon stamped with pig faces. I first walked to a dart board. The fat man with a mustache handed me six darts. I took my aim at the typical water balloons. With each throw the fat man got skinnier and younger. (Not better looking) The water balloons were filled with fetuses. Scary right? Tell me about.
Moving on! I went to the fortune teller. This was not the typical bony, skin heavy, raspy speaking creepy lady. No this was a homosexual body builder stature guy. He was wearing a backward baseball cap with a tiny tank top. He told me that by time i wanted to or was able to get married there weren't going to be any diamonds left for my ring.
Then I went on a ride. Usually I am all game for carni rides! The scarier the better. Except for one ride. The ride where you're spinning in a circle and the bucket you're sitting in is also spinning in a separate circle. After I got off this ride people were walking normal but their heads were spinning in circles. Round and round their body.
I finally woke up from this scary, weird, random, illogical dream. I'm watching what i eat from now on and contemplating about testing the water of La Grande.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Smart Weekend
After a long week of classes, work, maintaining one's health and dealing with unruly people, one is very much looking forward to a relaxing and a care free weekend. I know I was! Little did i know that this weekend was a weekend that brought up many overlooked questions and answered a few with logical responses or excuses. Not that i haven't thought of such things before, I have. The difference is that by some swarming effect, all of these Q and As came in one blissful weekend.
To start, salsa, like ketchup, can go with any food and every food (within stomach preferences). I love salsa and the spicier the better. The house was out of chips and I didn't have anything to mix with the salsa, but I really wanted salsa!!! Luckily I found japanese potato chips (taste no different than American potato chips just shaped differently).
Now, imagine the advertising market for japanese chips and salsa... who would be the spokesperson? A japanese fella in a sombrero? Or a hispanic eating with chop sticks?
Next realization was by accident. If you do not live with me you may not know that I sing or hum with the radio when cooking. I started bee boppin and buzzing my lips when the hissing sound came over me. Just then that thought was randomly linked to people who have a problem with lisping. Sorry if you do, I'm not making fun of you but realizing your dilema. Who invented the word 'lisp'? and why the hell would that person be so cruel to add the letter 'S' in that word? That's just sssssick!
I came upon other revolutionary discoveries such as too much butter in Macaroni and Cheese is a bad thing. Makes the texture feel like you're literally eating a stick of butter.
I realized that smiling at people out of pure kindness results in funny looks from those who you smile at. So don't be kind and smile. Fight your urge to smile at those who are either already cranky and really need a smile or a glimpse of warmth.
The wind is a determining factor in my jogging routine. I aimlessly jog for the heck of it on the weekends when i can (a healthier form of procrastination really). This weekend was so squally I felt like I was jogging in a wind tunnel with a parachute behind me. Needless to say my jog did not last more than a half hour and only for one day.
I thought drunken people were miserable to hang out with but I stood corrected when i met a high and drunk person. He was a winner! Unstable, unbalanced, no motor skills, none of the five senses were of his benefit... yes this was a real person and no i am not referring to a vegetable, even though it may sound to close to call.
There's no such thing as too many chick flicks! Even on a day when one is feeling up to par and like no one or nothing can tear them down, there's always a chick flick. Mine i have seen many times over and over (i secretly have frequent chick flick marathons. Next week's theme is Matthew McConaughey) I never get tired of them.
The worst noise on the weekend is an alarm clock that i forgot to turn to silent. It's just peachy waking up on my day to sleep in to the ear drum destroying 'BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP'... Lucky me!
Now that I feel smarter from my weekend i am privileged to go to classes, the doctors, work outs and study like a dedicated student i wish i was.
To start, salsa, like ketchup, can go with any food and every food (within stomach preferences). I love salsa and the spicier the better. The house was out of chips and I didn't have anything to mix with the salsa, but I really wanted salsa!!! Luckily I found japanese potato chips (taste no different than American potato chips just shaped differently).
Now, imagine the advertising market for japanese chips and salsa... who would be the spokesperson? A japanese fella in a sombrero? Or a hispanic eating with chop sticks?
Next realization was by accident. If you do not live with me you may not know that I sing or hum with the radio when cooking. I started bee boppin and buzzing my lips when the hissing sound came over me. Just then that thought was randomly linked to people who have a problem with lisping. Sorry if you do, I'm not making fun of you but realizing your dilema. Who invented the word 'lisp'? and why the hell would that person be so cruel to add the letter 'S' in that word? That's just sssssick!
I came upon other revolutionary discoveries such as too much butter in Macaroni and Cheese is a bad thing. Makes the texture feel like you're literally eating a stick of butter.
I realized that smiling at people out of pure kindness results in funny looks from those who you smile at. So don't be kind and smile. Fight your urge to smile at those who are either already cranky and really need a smile or a glimpse of warmth.
The wind is a determining factor in my jogging routine. I aimlessly jog for the heck of it on the weekends when i can (a healthier form of procrastination really). This weekend was so squally I felt like I was jogging in a wind tunnel with a parachute behind me. Needless to say my jog did not last more than a half hour and only for one day.
I thought drunken people were miserable to hang out with but I stood corrected when i met a high and drunk person. He was a winner! Unstable, unbalanced, no motor skills, none of the five senses were of his benefit... yes this was a real person and no i am not referring to a vegetable, even though it may sound to close to call.
There's no such thing as too many chick flicks! Even on a day when one is feeling up to par and like no one or nothing can tear them down, there's always a chick flick. Mine i have seen many times over and over (i secretly have frequent chick flick marathons. Next week's theme is Matthew McConaughey) I never get tired of them.
The worst noise on the weekend is an alarm clock that i forgot to turn to silent. It's just peachy waking up on my day to sleep in to the ear drum destroying 'BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP'... Lucky me!
Now that I feel smarter from my weekend i am privileged to go to classes, the doctors, work outs and study like a dedicated student i wish i was.
Monday, January 18, 2010
Weekend of new discoveries
After a long week of classes, work, maintaining one's health and dealing with unruly people, one is very much looking forward to a relaxing and a care free weekend. I know I was! Little did i know that this weekend was a weekend that brought up many overlooked questions and answered a few with logical responses or excuses. Not that i haven't thought of such things before, I have. The difference is that by some swarming effect, all of these Q and As came in one blissful weekend.
To start, salsa, like ketchup, can go with any food and every food (within stomach preferences). I love salsa and the spicier the better. The house was out of chips and I didn't have anything to mix with the salsa, but I really wanted salsa!!! Luckily I found japanese potato chips (taste no different than American potato chips just shaped differently).
Now, imagine the advertising market for japanese chips and salsa... who would be the spokesperson? A japanese fella in a sombrero? Or a hispanic eating with chop sticks?
Next realization was by accident. If you do not live with me you may not know that I sing or hum with the radio when cooking. I started bee boppin and buzzing my lips when the hissing sound came over me. Just then that thought was randomly linked to people who have a problem with lisping. Sorry if you do, I'm not making fun of you but realizing your dilema. Who invented the word 'lisp'? and why the hell would that person be so cruel to add the letter 'S' in that word? That's just sssssick!
I came upon other revolutionary discoveries such as too much butter in Macaroni and Cheese is a bad thing. Makes the texture feel like you're literally eating a stick of butter.
I realized that smiling at people out of pure kindness results in funny looks from those who you smile at. So don't be kind and smile. Fight your urge to smile at those who are either already cranky and really need a smile or a glimpse of warmth.
The wind is a determining factor in my jogging routine. I aimlessly jog for the heck of it on the weekends when i can (a healthier form of procrastination really). This weekend was so squally I felt like I was jogging in a wind tunnel with a parachute behind me. Needless to say my jog did not last more than a half hour and only for one day.
I thought drunken people were miserable to hang out with but I stood corrected when i met a high and drunk person. He was a winner! Unstable, unbalanced, no motor skills, none of the five senses were of his benefit... yes this was a real person and no i am not referring to a vegetable, even though it may sound to close to call.
There's no such thing as too many chick flicks! Even on a day when one is feeling up to par and like no one or nothing can tear them down, there's always a chick flick. Mine i have seen many times over and over (i secretly have frequent chick flick marathons. Next week's theme is Matthew McConaughey) I never get tired of them.
The worst noise on the weekend is an alarm clock that i forgot to turn to silent. It's just peachy waking up on my day to sleep in to the ear drum destroying 'BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP'... Lucky me!
Now that I feel smarter from my weekend i am privileged to go to classes, the doctors, work outs and study like a dedicated student i wish i was.
To start, salsa, like ketchup, can go with any food and every food (within stomach preferences). I love salsa and the spicier the better. The house was out of chips and I didn't have anything to mix with the salsa, but I really wanted salsa!!! Luckily I found japanese potato chips (taste no different than American potato chips just shaped differently).
Now, imagine the advertising market for japanese chips and salsa... who would be the spokesperson? A japanese fella in a sombrero? Or a hispanic eating with chop sticks?
Next realization was by accident. If you do not live with me you may not know that I sing or hum with the radio when cooking. I started bee boppin and buzzing my lips when the hissing sound came over me. Just then that thought was randomly linked to people who have a problem with lisping. Sorry if you do, I'm not making fun of you but realizing your dilema. Who invented the word 'lisp'? and why the hell would that person be so cruel to add the letter 'S' in that word? That's just sssssick!
I came upon other revolutionary discoveries such as too much butter in Macaroni and Cheese is a bad thing. Makes the texture feel like you're literally eating a stick of butter.
I realized that smiling at people out of pure kindness results in funny looks from those who you smile at. So don't be kind and smile. Fight your urge to smile at those who are either already cranky and really need a smile or a glimpse of warmth.
The wind is a determining factor in my jogging routine. I aimlessly jog for the heck of it on the weekends when i can (a healthier form of procrastination really). This weekend was so squally I felt like I was jogging in a wind tunnel with a parachute behind me. Needless to say my jog did not last more than a half hour and only for one day.
I thought drunken people were miserable to hang out with but I stood corrected when i met a high and drunk person. He was a winner! Unstable, unbalanced, no motor skills, none of the five senses were of his benefit... yes this was a real person and no i am not referring to a vegetable, even though it may sound to close to call.
There's no such thing as too many chick flicks! Even on a day when one is feeling up to par and like no one or nothing can tear them down, there's always a chick flick. Mine i have seen many times over and over (i secretly have frequent chick flick marathons. Next week's theme is Matthew McConaughey) I never get tired of them.
The worst noise on the weekend is an alarm clock that i forgot to turn to silent. It's just peachy waking up on my day to sleep in to the ear drum destroying 'BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP'... Lucky me!
Now that I feel smarter from my weekend i am privileged to go to classes, the doctors, work outs and study like a dedicated student i wish i was.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Nov 23, 09
Woke up this morning not feeling myself. You know those mornings after you wake up from a nightmare and you feel cold? It was one of those mornings.
Trying to warm myself up, I got ready for school. The usual routine: shower, teeth, eyes, clothes. On my way out the door I grabbed the beasics: phone, ipod, backpack.
Praying for a good day as I walked to school, I walked by the middle school and happened to notice the kids' activities. I wondered which clique I would fit into these days. Have I changed drastically? There were the sporty boys playing with a basketball, a group of girls sitting and gossiping, the typical immature middle school mix of girls and guys chasing each other through the front yard in hopes of tagging the other. Looks like I'd still be plaing basketball.
I made it through biology alive (never was the science type), and walked over to Newswriting class. We disscussed Ethics today. Now I fit in a majority group of people with a central/ common view of ethics, or so I thought. With about 20 people in class I felt like I was one of five outcasts. We viewed photos in the text of death, aggony, grief, and more. All stupedous photos. The question was to print the photo or not to print it? I did agree with the class on a few however there's always a Nut in life that really presses my buttons and makes me just want to scream a loud nothing at them and stick my tongue out! One of the many Nuts happens to be in my class.
Moving on from newswriting to media and slowly then back home for lunch. I submitted my first college news story today. The topic was lame but I felt it was a good beginning piece. It was an informative feature (though the editor may not be too happy about it being a feature) about the number of people going to tanning beds in the winter. Read the campus paper for more details.
I met with a photography professor and was able to be signed up for the beginning of photography course for next winter! The course that was full before sophomores were able to sign up for classes, the one that I thought I wasn't going to be able to take until next year! Things were looking up.
I went to weight lifting with my team. I ran the latter drills with Jordyn (teammate) before lifting. The lifting routines we do are so lame. I wish there was either more to them or more diversity in the lifts. An observation of my team. None of them like lifting... at least not lifting weights. They view weight lifting as more of a social event, like most girls do.
Me on the other hand, I like lifting weights. I like the unannounced competition that hangs in the midst of the gym, the satisfaction that I'm getting into shape and feeling healthy, plus I like the pain. I like waking up the next morning sore, going "oo, ouch". For girls like me, I get one of two things (sometimes both) from the people in the weight room: I either get the laughing and mockery from people watching them think "haha she's a girl. what is she doing trying to lift weights?" Then when I'm able to lift my own weight (sometimes more if it's a legs day) then I get them scowling at me, thinking "She's a freak and makin me have to actually work so I don't get passed up by a girl."
Jordyn made dinner for me tonight. I then went home to whind down for the night, followed by some homework with narcotic powers. I packed most of my stuff for the weekend at home. I'm so glad to be going home for Thanksgiving. I haven't been home since the beginning of August. I miss home. It's my salt and water.
Finally, I review the day I had that started from a nightmare and ending with a tranquil evening. Sweet dreams y'all.
Trying to warm myself up, I got ready for school. The usual routine: shower, teeth, eyes, clothes. On my way out the door I grabbed the beasics: phone, ipod, backpack.
Praying for a good day as I walked to school, I walked by the middle school and happened to notice the kids' activities. I wondered which clique I would fit into these days. Have I changed drastically? There were the sporty boys playing with a basketball, a group of girls sitting and gossiping, the typical immature middle school mix of girls and guys chasing each other through the front yard in hopes of tagging the other. Looks like I'd still be plaing basketball.
I made it through biology alive (never was the science type), and walked over to Newswriting class. We disscussed Ethics today. Now I fit in a majority group of people with a central/ common view of ethics, or so I thought. With about 20 people in class I felt like I was one of five outcasts. We viewed photos in the text of death, aggony, grief, and more. All stupedous photos. The question was to print the photo or not to print it? I did agree with the class on a few however there's always a Nut in life that really presses my buttons and makes me just want to scream a loud nothing at them and stick my tongue out! One of the many Nuts happens to be in my class.
Moving on from newswriting to media and slowly then back home for lunch. I submitted my first college news story today. The topic was lame but I felt it was a good beginning piece. It was an informative feature (though the editor may not be too happy about it being a feature) about the number of people going to tanning beds in the winter. Read the campus paper for more details.
I met with a photography professor and was able to be signed up for the beginning of photography course for next winter! The course that was full before sophomores were able to sign up for classes, the one that I thought I wasn't going to be able to take until next year! Things were looking up.
I went to weight lifting with my team. I ran the latter drills with Jordyn (teammate) before lifting. The lifting routines we do are so lame. I wish there was either more to them or more diversity in the lifts. An observation of my team. None of them like lifting... at least not lifting weights. They view weight lifting as more of a social event, like most girls do.
Me on the other hand, I like lifting weights. I like the unannounced competition that hangs in the midst of the gym, the satisfaction that I'm getting into shape and feeling healthy, plus I like the pain. I like waking up the next morning sore, going "oo, ouch". For girls like me, I get one of two things (sometimes both) from the people in the weight room: I either get the laughing and mockery from people watching them think "haha she's a girl. what is she doing trying to lift weights?" Then when I'm able to lift my own weight (sometimes more if it's a legs day) then I get them scowling at me, thinking "She's a freak and makin me have to actually work so I don't get passed up by a girl."
Jordyn made dinner for me tonight. I then went home to whind down for the night, followed by some homework with narcotic powers. I packed most of my stuff for the weekend at home. I'm so glad to be going home for Thanksgiving. I haven't been home since the beginning of August. I miss home. It's my salt and water.
Finally, I review the day I had that started from a nightmare and ending with a tranquil evening. Sweet dreams y'all.
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